Daily Kos

i think i'm going to Crawford tomorrow.

Fri May 05, 2006 at 02:05:22 PM PDT

I realize that I am probably offering myself as a human pinata by stating this here, on the Kos, in my first diary ever. And on Cinco de Mayo - ai, dios mio.  Nonetheless, if I'm going to do this, I want to be as open and as public as possible about it. Tomorrow I am driving down to Crawford Texas to join the Minutemen's Caravan to protest illegal immigration.

My credentials include years (pretty much my entire adult life) spent living in inner city neighborhoods in major American cities, most recently San Diego- not the posh gentrified sections of the cities, but in the parts i could afford. The neighborhoods included a pastiche of inhabitants: some white people, mostly not, and none wealthy. The areas were commonly accepted as being pretty "ghetto." Or must I now say "barrio?"

During these years, I have fought, and in most cases have failed, to try to secure any assistance from our government's "social safety net" when I have needed it. In education, with health and disability issues, whenever I have needed anything from this system, I have been refused. Over the years I have been lucky enough to be with someone who usually has a decent job which sometimes even includes (gasp!) health insurance. But those were the lucky years, and they made up maybe half of the time.  

And that insurance is increasingly useless- first HMOs sliced it into barely useable ribbons, now general Republican erosion is turning those into shreds & pulp. One example- In Texas, if your company has less than 50 employees, you don't have to provide coverage for serious mental illness.
What is that - legal discrimination against the neurologically impaired?! Did we run through the streets with the wrong flag or something?

So... Immigrants can come & rise up the ladder through hard work but they'd better not have anyone bipolar or depressed in their family, or they may end up bankrupt in an emergency room? These are the kinds of details that just take too much time for many people to notice, or to include in their mythical calculations that find it acceptable to import the poor from entire neighboring nations to our south.

What I am getting at is that I am one of the many Americans who always seems to slip through the cracks, fall into the doughnut holes, whatever.  And I come from a middle-class white background. What about many black people who have been here for generations but never seem to feel like full participants in this country?  What about all kinds of people who were tossed off welfare while the government poured many times that small "savings" into corporate welfare (and allows companies like Wal-mart to basically milk the social system for the benefits it doesn't offer its workers?)

What about the people of New Orleans?!

This nation is severe and harsh in how it treats its own citizens- at least those who, through birth or circumstance, are not financially independent "people of means." The American Dream of working one's way up to success and happiness is almost completely a mirage at this point. Many diaries point that out in perfect detail here on this blog every day. So why is it considered "racist" or "xenophobic" to insist that we stop a massive illegal influx of human beings whose presence here will exacerbate this problem exponentially?

Yes, I know, most of us outside Bush's "Haves & have-mores" are having to fight like animals for the scraps allotted to us. Yes, we are having to tussle with third world countries overseas because of outsourcing. I'll go to Crawford for that one too, & if that makes me Lou Dobbs' bee-otch, I can live with that.

One of the courtesies I would like to extend to my recently-arrived co-inhabitants of this country is having the luxury to think of the consequences of current events. I know what it's like to be so overwhelmed with basic survival requirements that I don't have the time to engage in much political philosophy or sociological analysis. I have not seen many comments or diaries here written by day laborers, for example. Has anyone bothered to let the illegal immigrants know that the privileges of citizenship are already overhyped & mythologized, and that they are diluted more the more people that are included? If they were on the other side of the equation, seeing the tiny amount of benefits allotted per capita decreasing with the population of poor people increasing, would they welcome all peoples with open arms and borders? I highly doubt it. From what I can see, hear, and read, at least in L.A., they are making many urban blacks outcasts in their own neighborhoods with favoritism in hiring and displacement through sheer numbers. How many times has California been the canary in the cultural coalmine for this country?
And again, I ask, what about New Orleans? Citizens could not get jobs rebuilding their own city for a decent wage when Bush chopped the labor restrictions and scores of illegals were brought in to do the jobs "Americans won't do" once again.

Enough about economics. There are other cultural issues that are enough in themselves to have me getting in the car for Crawford with my Faux-News-watching mother tomorrow.

Has it occurred to anyone that a huge increase in old-world/3rd world Catholics being added to the voter rolls will skew social issues into the conservative netherworld for at least few decades? Gays, cancel those wedding plans. Ladies, you'd better not get pregnant unless you mean it.
I am not trying to pick on Hispanics here, that's just who happens to be flowing in due to proximity. Many cultures are less woman-&-gay-friendly than ours, and usually moreso amongst the less affluent. But this is the reality. In a country so closely divided, the huge increase in "traditional values" people will turn the country redder and redder, especially with the Republicans' desire to exploit cheap labor which is encased within their "welcome willing workers" talking points.

As I have said to many of my liberal, lefty friends (which is pretty much all of them,) "the artists and intellectuals of Mexico City are staying there- that's not who's coming." But their faces glazed over as large thought-bubbles over their heads proclaimed "oh my god, i didn't know she was racist."

The most personal aspects of my desire to stop illegal immigration are based on my day-to-day San Diego living experiences. I know, this won't go over well with many people here, but it has drastically affected my life, in large part causing me to move across the country in search of a more serene and less hostile home environment. Please keep in mind that I have always deliberately sought multicultural, non-sanitized places to live and visit.
I still feel that way about travel, but have had to retreat to an exurban residence to ensure even the most basic living standards.

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There are three main areas of concern that I want to point out here in which I feel liberal values and ideals are in serious jeopardy with tens of millions of illegals entering and staying in this country.

Machismo - Gender-specific & General Hostility
-- In the six years that I lived in Southern California, I must honestly say that most post-pubescent, working class Latino males acted really dismissive to me in general life (in my neighborhood, not when I was buying food from them at their restaurants.) They would often not even respond or make eye contact, especially if I ask them to turn down the bass, or to please stop working on their (idling, fume-cloud-creating) car outside my open bedroom window, or even "who keeps tagging the palm tree trunks on our block?"

Or "Please obey the city ordinances about businesses and noise, because I will never be able to sell this house if potential buyers hear the bass booming from blocks away."

I know, I've heard it a million times: "Latinos don't all do that." Of course not! I'm just saying what happened to me consistently while living 20 minutes from the international border.

Oddly, now that I think about it, the rudest were the guys who spoke english, so maybe I need to address this in more detail at a later time.

And again, keep in mind that I'm the same honky female who had to try to negotiate for quiet with a large group of intoxicated black males who were shooting craps on the sidewalk in front of our house all night. The results were mixed, but better. At worst I was openly defied, or mocked for needing so much sleep, as opposed to the patronizing, dismissive, or falsely-placating treatmentI received from the hispanic men.

ok, I'm going in where angels truly fear to tread, and will indict myself in several directions in the process - I will now bring up male catcalls and on-the-street flirting in different cultures. Again, i am a white female, and if it helps the reader to note it, i can say that my physical form is voluptuous- some might say outside the bounds of what the average white man might currently deem ideal. Perhaps it has clouded my judgement to have received so much open approval from the African-American men on the street. But I grew up in Texas, and have not been a stranger to the "Pssssst Pssst" or ___(insert pure hissing sound) offered by many a Hispanic man.

I have to honestly say that the hissing thing has always felt more dehumanizing that the brazen open approach of the black man. And i am not one of those women who always finds this kind of thing offensive- at least not now that I am older and have gained some weight. And maybe the hiss or "leaky tire" as i sometimes call it is a result of a language barrier. But the result is the same- i prefer a worded approach, if there must be one, so that i can at least respond in words. What does one say to "psssss psss pssss?"
I remember the first time a Latin guy did that, I thought he was trying to tell me a secret!!

For the record, I haven't spent much time living amongst poor white people, except a few Meth addicts that would come & go from the San Diego 'hood. They didn't catcall, but could be dismissive and hostile in an entirely different way (which, oddly enough, seemed gender-equal- ?! )

Environment
--The area in which I lived in San Diego was, for some strange reason, home to what I think was called "the country's most modern fuel station" at the time. It sold ethanol, biodiesel, and much more.
The car dealership attached to the station sold hybrid vehicles and gave free Segway test drives. At least, that was what it was like when it opened. After the initial Redevelopment District / publicly funded construction and opening, all of this gave way to car customization, including audio & hydraulics. Now I play quite a bit of Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, and I can appreciate a tricked-out ride.  But I doubt that our neighborhood was the best place for this investment in future fuels and technologies. Most people in City Heights have cars that barely run, usually many of them, parked all over the street. And the Latino families on my block had by far the most people per household, so they had the most cars per building. I know there is much complaint whenever someone says something like this, but it is a real trend, and should be at least considered in any immigration equations.  Two households on our block had been built 80 or 90 years ago as single family residences on narrow lots, and were now inhabited by multiple Latino families each. One had a sort of tent-city-shack complex behind it. I assumed that this was not a pleasant place to be, since the teen males of that & other households seemed to prefer to sit on what was left of an old fence along the side front of the property. Everything within a few yards of their sitting space was tagged (marked with graffiti, in paint, sharpie, scratched or cut in, or even drawn in acid on the windows of the corner shop.) From that "hub," the graffiti was scattered on most available surfaces throughout our block. Sides of houses were gouged, sidewalks sprayed, fences a constant battleground, the aforementioned tree trunks vandalized.
The times I have talked to the young congregating males, primarily to get someone to move a vehicle that was literally parked in front of my driveway, they mentioned their "uncle," who I think owns the house.
I have tried to talk with him, even when first moving in, just to say hi (before any issues became apparent, ) and he treated me automatically like an enemy or persona non grata.
(What gives?)

What I am getting at is that the immigration wave I saw was a promise of many many more vehicles on the road, and if improvements were to be made on these vehicles, they would involve booming of bass rather than increased fuel standards and emissions. Generally, the vehicles are on their last leg before heading to the scrap heap - which is almost a form of recycling.
But multiply this effect, and this reality is not looking like an improvement for the country.
People coming from the third world do not generally have the luxury of considering global warming in all their economic decisions. They are not to be blamed, but it is foolish to ignore the impact their effect will have on physical surroundings.

On a much more trivial note, I did find it increasingly alienating and depressing to have large groups of children speaking Spanish on their way to and from the elementary school on the next block, littering daily in my yard (bulk litter- not just a candy wrapper here and there. and often with their mothers present.) In the few years I lived near the school, which had been a small art deco structure, it transformed into a hideous 'plex of trailers and brightly painted traffic lanes taking over what had been a small playground and even smaller front strip of grass. Am I a superficial villain for caring about the architecture? A lazy gringa for complaining about people using my yard as a garbage can? And I have nothing against Spanish, but I did find it disorienting to hear nothing else being spoken by passers-by for hours on end. I admit it. Yes, me, the one who always sought the unfamiliar, the exotic - the one who would rather starve than eat British food or a slice of "American" cheese. Say what you will - it all just wore me down. I have to learn "please pick up your trash" in Spanish just to keep my yard from looking post-apocalyptic?

Animal treatment
-- Like I said, I'm not rich. So I have a yard sale when need be - and in San Diego, the need occurred. After the first day, I was exhausted and a little sunburned. I counted the monies, reorganized the remaining "merchandise," and went in to rest & rehydrate. On and off over the course of the afternoon evening, I kept hearing a strange high mewing- it sounded desperate, but there are a lot of stray cats nearby and it didn't sound like the two ferals that kind of "came with" our house (or our 3 feline pets, who I keep indoors.)  One low-income white neighbor leaves her pets out without the benefit of having been spayed or neutered, and I have talked to her about it with little result, but the biggest breeding house is the back of the Latino "uncle's" place. The young girl there is always talking about the latest litter, and strays run wild in the front yard day & night. I think at one point the little girl told another neighbor that she had 20 cats and kittens. Inevitably some leave, some are killed - when I first moved in, I called Animal Cruelty about the one with the burned tail (I think they took it, but left the rest?)  None are spayed or neutered. Yes, it's a cliche, and I am sure that many Hispanic people are humane and responsible pet owners - I am just describing my experience. Check out some animal welfare websites, especially those that work in/with Mexico - there is a definite bias in Latin culture against neutering pets, especially males.

In any event, the crying meow sound continued past midnight, when I realized I needed to check it out. I followed the sound to underneath a car next to the "hangout" fence, where i found a tiny recently-born kitten, filthy and having some crusted blood on its stomach. I was shocked that such a miniscule creature had been making such a loud sound, and horrified that i hadn't gone out sooner.

I brought the little thing inside my living room, where I cleaned it up a little and tried to give it water and food. The stomach thing looked like a partial umbilical cord- I realized there was tissue attached to it too. After trying to hold and comfort the kitten for a while, I realized the poor thing was still bleeding, and called an animal E.R. I was told that the kitten had a birth defect or injury from the mother cat trying to cut the umbilical cord, and that the intestines had been pulled outward. The vet said that the kitten was in a lot of pain, and that it was dying, & couldn't be saved. The kindest thing to do was apparently to bring it in and let them humanely put it out of its misery. So that's what I did- at 2 or 3 a.m. with a yard sale to host in the morning. I think at one point, the little girl and a woman who spoke no english came out to see what was going on when i first found the kitten- it was definitely theirs, I remember the girl saying, and they seemed completely oblivious to the fact that it was dying or even uncomfortable, even though they could not have possibly not heard its pitiful cries.

I am not saying that this is a metaphor for the human health care issues which illegal immigration brings to the surface.
For now, I am talking about cultural issues towards the treatment of animals. I do think that there are a few parallels between the two realms,
but I am sure i would be flamed to the outer galaxies if I got into that right now, while I'm already so angry and outraged at the idiotic neglect and carelessness this family showed towards a small helpless kitten.

I could go on... about how illegal immigration is hurting those citizens here who need it least in public education, health care, storm-ravaged cities, well-meaning liberal city dwellers...
but I think I'll go make my signs for tomorrow's "Reckoning at the Ranch" in Crawford.

If anyone's still with me, any ideas what those signs should say?

Poll

What should my sign say at the anti-illegal-immigration rally tomorrow?

13%2 votes
6%1 votes
46%7 votes
6%1 votes
6%1 votes
20%3 votes

| 15 votes | Vote | Results

Tags: immigration, minutemen, Lou Dobbs, illegal, exploitation, mental health, kittens (all tags) :: Previous Tag Versions

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